Minty the Assassin

Eugene Baldovino
2009-08-07

A fanboy fantasy about lesbians, martial arts, high heels and science.
2.5
80 min

MINTY is a youthful, raven haired, punk rock, feminist, female super heroine, that gets her super powers from eating chocolate (which is a good source of antioxidants). One day Minty's agent, BIG BOSS, an older and honorable gentlemen, is taken hostage by DOCTOR BRAIN BENDER, the evil neuro-scientist. Minty then fights her way up various perverse floors of Doctor Brain Bender's paranormal building to rescue Big Boss. Several unusual villains stand in her way: CAPTAIN CAPABILITY, a freak of nature; SENSATIONAL NINJA, an effeminate assassin; RAT MONSTER, a depressed mutant; BRUCE ZEE, a psycho martial artist; MOLLY LEVIATHAN, a sensual super vixen; ZEN COWBOY, a blindfolded gunslinger; and DOUBLE DELICIOUS, an intellectual lesbian vampire. Throughout this wild odyssey, Minty educates her adversaries on the fascinating world of natural science and then uses her beauty, her brains, and pure brutality to demonstrate the biological theory of the survival of the fittest

Cast

Name Character Team
Elina Madison Minty Unowned
Anthony Ray Parker Big Boss Unowned
Tabitha Taylor Double Delicious Unowned
Chip Joslin Dr. Brain Bender Unowned
Jacki R. Chan Molly Leviathan Unowned
Hawk Younkins Captain Capability Unowned
Ricardo Mamood-Vega Zen Cowboy Unowned
Elan Tom Bruce Zee Unowned
David A. Lockhart Rat Monster Unowned
Nora J. Novak Cute Postal Woman Unowned
Jade English Hot Security Guard Unowned
McKay Stewart Sensational Ninja Unowned